Sticking with it..

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One of the things I know about myself is that I have a lot of ideas. I have a lot of good ideas; and that is all that they are is ideas.  I write them down and then leave them there.  I re-read them a month or two later and then think; “Guess I should do something with this”.   I get so caught up in my day-to-day life that I let good ideas fall away. I get caught up in the excuses.

“I’m too busy”

“I’m too tired”

“I don’t have time”

“I’ll do it tomorrow”

I’m sure you can relate. Honestly, this blog is one of those things.  I remember starting this and thinking; “this is it.. if I blog about it then I will be held responsible. If I’m having to update and write about it then I’ll follow through.”  My first post was 2 months ago.  That speaks for itself.

I’m going to be brutally honest here. I have not done as much as I would like to change the situation I described in my first post. I have done a few things; I froze my Facebook account and then I decided I would start making jewelry.  One of the friends I mentioned earlier that are successful in working for themselves makes amazing jewelry. I was inspired by this and thought to myself one day.. “I can make jewelry.”   I was an art major in college and understand all concepts of design and have a creative mind. So far I have made some pretty cool stuff. I have been wearing it around and have had many compliments on my designs.  I will probably keep doing it as a hobby and make it for my friends and I.   After doing it for a month or so I’m not sure it’s something I want to do as a career.   I feel good about this, because I now know that I tried it and I know that, even though I can do it, it’s not what I’m looking for long-term. What I will do, is sell what I have made at a craft fair or on Etsy and get them money back on the investment.   I do not feel like this is a loss, but a step in finding out what it is that I really want. I tried something and now I know, to try something else.

In addition to being creative, another thing I really love is fitness. I am seriously considering doing a Fitness “bikini” Competition that is being held on July 5, 2014. I have about a week to really consider this and see where it takes me. It is something I have always toyed with. In the past I have always said it wasnt for me because I love to eat and I love to drink wine. Committing to this would mean no wine for 3 months and a very restricted diet. That being said, I feel like I need to do something drastic to get me out of my comfort zone.  It’s a hard decision to make. I have a lot of thinking to do.

 

 

A Promise to myself

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There are 2 types of people in the world… Those with a dream that go after it, and those with a dream who do only that… Dream. Then there is me, who dreams of having a dream to go after. Now it’s not that I don’t have dreams per se… My problem lies in not knowing how to make them into a career. I guess one of my dreams is having a job I love. I want to wake up excited to be working. I want work to not be work. I have two separate friends who have successfully open their own businesses and are thriving and happy. I dream to be like that. I just don’t know what “that” looks like for me. I rack my brain daily…. I think what could I do??!! I keep coming up blank and then feel this empty hole inside. It gets very frustrating because I feel very strongly there is something… It just always seems out of reach.. At the tip of my tongue.

I’ve been doing more thinking than usual about this, and feel that I have got to take some kind of action. Now I know.. What you’re thinking. How is she going to take action if she doesn’t know what to take action on?

Well the answer to that is self discovery. I have spent most of 2013 being unhappy in some way. I’ve been unhappy with my actions, unhappy with my living situation, unhappy with my job, unhappy with my body, unhappy with my dog, literally unhappy with being unhappy! I’m over it.

2014 is going to be a journey.. A journey of being true to myself… Cutting through the BS and I believe if I can do that.. Then my dream of finding my dream job will just fall into place.
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